Woman of Hope: Things Will Work Out

Hope is something I’ve been trying to work on more lately because I feel like I’ve been losing it and caving in to anxiety, confusion, or despair. Hope helps bring me back to an eternal perspective that everything is going to work out and these trials, weaknesses, or hardships are for my good.

Emily is energetic, fun-loving, and friendly. She loves to dance, dance, and dance some more. You will find Emily socializing with family and friends, eating popcorn or chips and salsa, exploring the outdoors, and beautifying her home. Emily finds joy through connecting with people and learning from their different life perspectives.

How would you describe hope?

I studied hope a lot in Preach My Gospel because I didn’t understand it. Hope is a belief that things will work out – when you’re looking back at life, they usually do. Hope for me is a mixture of faith, belief, and optimism. It is believing that good things will come.

How has practicing hope blessed your life?

It has helped me to have a lot more peace which I feel is hard to find in the world today. Hope is something I’ve been trying to work on more lately because I feel like I’ve been losing it and caving in to anxiety, confusion, or despair. Hope helps bring me back to an eternal perspective that everything is going to work out and these trials, weaknesses, or hardships are for my good.

What has made it harder to be hopeful?

On my church mission I felt a lot of pressure to do my best and always be on top of things because it was the Lord’s time. Most of that pressure wasn’t good or healthy for me. I felt like any time I ever wasted was not ok. When I returned home I was in a very negative work environment that I was not used to being exposed to. I experienced a lot of anxiety as a result. Since then, I feel like I haven’t learned how to keep the pressures of the world from overwhelming me – I let it escalate too much. So, I’m trying to learn how to keep hope despite the pressures of the world.

 When you start to experience anxiety, what helps you refocus on hope?

My husband has helped me a lot. It’s so helpful to have another person recognize that something is building inside me and it’s too much for me to handle right now. He has taught me not to make decisions in emotional or irrational moments. If I’m asked to do something and I get stressed and worried and feel like “I can’t do this,” I try to take time to pause before deciding. When I’m not so emotionally stressed about the situation, I consider, “Would I be able to work this out or handle it?” Or I ask myself, “Can I do this?” and work through the details instead of automatically turning down the opportunity. I’m still working on this, but it helps to slow down when there’s so much going on and I have a big to-do list – to force myself to just breathe.

That’s why dance has been so good and therapeutic for me because with dance you have to be in the moment. You absolutely have to be. It’s all physical – you shut your brain off or focus it on a body part or your body as a whole – so you must literally shut the world out of your brain and focus on your body. That has been the most therapeutic thing for me. Dance has really helped me to breathe. And after the dance class, even if I was so stressed beforehand, I find that I feel like, “Ok, now I can do this.” Nothing changed about the situation, but I was able to take time to breathe and disconnect from the stress. It’s so hard to force yourself to breathe so having something consistent, like dance, that allowed me to slow down has been such a blessing.

 Who has mentored you in your quest to develop hope?

Definitely my mother. She was always there when we needed her, physically there at home. Any time I needed to talk about something, I knew I could talk to her about it because she would listen. She wouldn’t ever lecture me, but she would listen and ask questions. Growing up, I was able to explain to her how I felt or the problems I was having with my friends or other things. Even when we would come home late at night she would be there to chat with.

Just being able to work through situations with her helped me to understand that my challenges were not the end-all-be-all, they never were. You can always work through things by talking or sorting them out. She was always so positive and excited about life, no matter what it was. Mothers have the strongest influence on their children and I am so grateful for mine.

What have you learned about hope from Jesus Christ?

Christ always turned things back to the Father – always. With that eternal perspective, He never complained, even when He was being persecuted and was going to be sacrificed. He asked the Father for help. Christ always turned things back to the Father and He knew that was what life was all about, that His relationship with God was what was most important.

That is what is most important in this life. There are a lot of other important things, but nothing is as important as the Father. And the Father knows that it really will all work out and be things we are supposed to experience and that we will all end up in another life someday. Christ is so good at that. He does not stress or worry – He just does. He acts and believes and turns everyone back to the Father.

What advice would you give someone who wants to know how to develop more hope?

Talking to people is so beneficial – talking to your mom, spouse, friends, or roommates. Talking to people helps you understand the bigger perspective. If they can give you healthy feedback or regurgitate what you just told them, it helps us to understand things in a different way or perspective that we’re not emotionally attached to. Writing things out is also valuable.

I find the greatest help when I find the Holy Spirit – when I read my scriptures or listen to church music. Learn ways to connect with the Spirit because the Spirit connects us back with Heavenly Father again. That’s where we find peace, which helps us to feel like there’s hope.