Over the years, I have come to look more at the big picture as opposed to getting stuck in the weeds of daily life. But, in my current situation, I don’t think that’s the best idea.
Just the other day, I felt impressed to take a few quiet moments to flip back through my journal entries of the past few months. As my eyes glanced over the words I had scribbled, I noticed some repetition. I don’t know about you, but my journal entries are a mix – of stories I want to remember, random thoughts that enter my mind and things I learn during my morning scripture study. The repetition I saw was a thought. On several occasions, I had written down the thought ‘something in my life is going to change. Something big.’
In the past, that thought has usually led to our family moving to a new city. But, that isn’t what I’m feeling this time. Just last weekend, something big did change in my life. And while there are elements of sadness to it, overall, it’s an exciting change and one I’m thrilled to embrace. As I have pondered this change the past few days, I can’t shake the feeling that this is not the final step in the big change I have felt coming. And it has me a bit unnerved and completely curious and anxious to know what the rest of the change actually is!
It is no coincidence to me that my Bible study this week has me in the book of James. In Chapter 1 verses 2-4, we read “My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.” (KJV)
Over the years, I have come to look more at the big picture as opposed to getting stuck in the weeds of daily life. But, in my current situation, I don’t think that’s the best idea. I am noticing a feeling of unease creeping in. I’m so busy anxiously trying to figure out what this ‘big change’ might be, I’m completely missing out on little changes that are happening daily. Changes I need to be thankful for!
After studying these verses in James this week, I was left with the question ‘How do I exhibit my faith by waiting patiently?’ And knowing that one translation of the word ‘perfect’ is ‘whole’, ‘How do I feel whole or content with where I’m at knowing that change is on the horizon?’
Thankfully, James gives me the answer just a short while later. In James 3:5 we are reminded that “Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth.” (KJV) The power of the small and simple things washed over me as I read those words. I need to open my eyes to the little things every single day. I need to ASK for eyes to see them. As I have done so, my mind is less frantic about what could possibly be coming. Instead, I am spending an extra 10 minutes with my four year old at bedtime. As I cross my eyes and make silly faces, she laughs uncontrollably. I am reminded what pure joy and happiness look and feel like. As I read the next chapter in the Penderwick series with my 9 year old, her curiosity about what happens next fills me with excitement. And I notice that my 13 year old just needs some quality time when he begs me to sit down and watch an episode of Relative Race with him.
These small and simple things are kindling joy for me right now. The waiting in patience feels more like happiness and less like work. They help me to feel whole and content, in this moment.
The waiting space can definitely be a trial of your faith, but it doesn’t have to be. If you find yourself in a period where you’re needing to practice patiently waiting, step back from the big picture. Look at the current day and find the small moments of joy. It is in those little things we are made whole.
Photo from Unsplash by Sylwia Bartyzel
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